Dream Interpretation & Your Relationship

Relationship Healing for Women

Understanding your dreams can help you.
Knowing what my dreams mean helps me with everything in life and they can help you the same way.

Dreams Show Your Partner’s Mood.
You need time out to yourself to keep your centre, it’s imperative. Women have a massive load they’re carrying re relationship, personal, family and work responsibilities and yet they’re feeling guilty giving to themselves amidst the enormous amount they’re giving to others.

Leaving a Friendship vs Leaving a Relationship.
The process you go through is very similar, drawing up a physical or mental pros and con lists for and against, but women are so much clearer when they are considering leaving a friend, compared to when they consider leaving their man. With their friend, their crimes are obvious, with their man, his crimes get excused or she tells herself it didn’t happen or it’s not important.

Should you have left your relationship yesterday?
If you feel you should have left your relationship yesterday, then do it! My short boost of encouragement. Or do it when you’re ready. I didn’t leave my relationship when I knew I should have. It took me years to decide, all the signs were there from the beginning.

We also had a question from chat regarding…

Work-Life Balance with Less Guilt.
There’s never a good time, not to feel the guilt. Guilt is not something you can just get over, you’ve been instilled with it since your childhood and you’ve copied the guilt of giving to yourself, into your work life and relationships too.

And we did a Tarot reading for everyone live in chat or listening.

THE 8 OF SWORDS – How it applies to the stress of short term commitments – How it applies to leaving a relationship or friendship. – How it applies to going on a holiday and moving in with somebody.

Dream Meanings Are Not Obvious.
You might think that one particular dream is about your relationship, but in fact, its meaning can also be applied to helping you expand your creativity and allowing you to heal from painful childhood experiences.

How To Remember Your Dreams.
Having a desire to remember your dreams will eventually make you remember your dreams. A good diet, lots of fruit and vegetables, less meat, fewer vices, less pharmaceutical and recreational drugs will help you remember your dreams and help you have positive dreams.

Relationship Advice for Women Testimonial

The Truth About People In Dreams

From “The Healing Show” Series #09: Change Your Life Through Dreaming

When you have a conflict with somebody, when something isn’t resolved or when there is guess work, your dreams can show you the truth about people.

Forget how nice another person might be acting toward you in waking life, if it shows in the dream that they have a problem with you, take the dream meaning into account or even further, let the dream truth override the waking life truth (in most cases).

If a person is holding back their feelings and pretending not to care, but in the dream they act like they’re in love with you or want to be your best friend, take the truth from the dream about how the person really feels.

Use your dreams as a measure to determine what to believe about another and how much time and energy you should invest. The dream will generally tell you what is the real state of affairs.

Dream 1 Interpreted

From “The Healing Show” Series #09: Chamge Your Life Through Dreaming

Energy, Spirits And Childhood Conditioning.

It’s much easier to exemplify dream interpretation by using one dream as a case study, rather than say, using a dream dictionary approach. This message about dreams is one in which I discuss everything necessary for a dream interpretation. I discuss what happened in the dream, what happened before the dream and how the interpretation of the dream applies to life with all the insights and answers it can offer.

As I worked through the following dream, I learnt a lot about myself: how energy works, how family conditioning plays out and I learnt more about the spirit world. All of this helped me feel at peace after the dream, which I would not have felt if I ignored the dream. If I had ignored the dream, I would have felt much like I did before I had the dream, which was pretty awful.

What happened the day before the dream:
Writing your dream in your dream diary is good, but you must also write up what happened before the dream, just a few lines will do. It is an essential part of your dream interpretation study to link up what you experienced earlier, with the dream, ie the day before you had the dream or the week leading up to the dream.

The day before my dream went like this:

I rang up a friend whom I’ve known for countless years, for the sole purpose of discussing our damaged friendship and how we might mend it. Normally this kind of conversation always comes from me because she’s so great at avoiding the subject. I was hoping in this conversation that she would do some of the work of helping to fix us. She didn’t. I was fuming.

She told me a story instead, about where she’d been and how full on it was for her. At this stage I’m thinking that I don’t care about her story, I care about fixing the friendship. Then I thought she might need to air the story first before she could talk about us, so I let her tell me in detail about the ins and outs of her trip interstate.

She had gone back to her ex family home as there was a problem about it’s ownership amongst her siblings, as her parents had died. She told me of all the professionals and officials she had to call on to help resolve the matter. It sounded like a really big deal! It had taken much energy from her as every single day of her one month trip was something to do with the house.

I tried not to ask too many questions because I wanted to show her that the phone call wasn’t about her story, it was about our friendship. She didn’t actually get back to discussing our friendship and I hung up feeling quite angry. Not only did she avoid talking about our friendship, I also got sucked in to wondering more about her story, since I had been to the house in question and met her parents (when they were alive). I was annoyed at myself because I inadvertently found myself thinking about her life and trying to sort it out in my head. I tried to stop thinking about her.

The Dream:

When you record your dreams in your dream diary, be that a physical notebook, in your mobile, email or in a computer file, write as much as you can remember about your dream. This can become a time consuming process so if you’re short of time, as much as you can write in a few minutes is better than nothing.

My dream went like this: I was in her family home and it was during the day. Her Mum (died years ago) walked passed me. She was happy to see me, I was glad to see her too, but I could tell that she was unhappy with the fight about the ownership of the house. The Mother went into another part of the house. I proceeded to clean up the rubbish in the house. Very unpleasant.

I could smell in the dream, how stinky the rubbish was, as food and drink were going off in the heat (it was a hot day in the dream). I got what mess I could into a big rubbish bag and took it out of the house, looking for a bin to put it into. I saw my friend lying on a bench outside the house. My friend looked like she was in a coma, that is, she was completely out of it. Even if she had wanted to communicate with me in the dream, because I was standing a meter away from her, she had zero energy to do so. I felt sad and sorry for her. Dream ended.

Dream interpretation:

Even if you don’t know what your dream is about, write down what you think it could be about. Link up what happened the day before you had the dream, with your dream and see if there are any patterns. You can always get your dreams interpreted by yours truly or by some other means, as the messages in them are invaluable for your progress in life.

I interpreted my dream as follows: the way my friend was exhausted in the dream is how she was at the time of our phone call, even though she didn’t know it. My friend didn’t have the energy to talk about our friendship when I called her because she hadn’t emotionally or physically recovered from her trip. Even if she had wanted to have the energy for our friendship and talk about how we were going to mend our relationship, she didn’t have it.

The dream taught me about energy: If somebody has come back from a place where a lot was going on and things are left unfinished, the person’s energy is likely to still be there- interstate, in the case of my friend. Her energy had not returned to Melbourne where we both live at the moment, her energy was still interstate. She could not be present in our conversation even if she wanted to because like the dream, she was almost comatose as far as her involvement in anything but her own recovery.

The dream taught me about spirits: Spirits are just as real as flesh and blood except most of us can’t see them or feel them. My friend’s Mum was in my dream as though to tell me that she was aware of the problems with the house and that she was with my friend during the process of her trip. If my friend paid attention to her dreams, then perhaps she would have dreamt of her own Mum and felt supported by the energetic presence of her. If my friend considered her dreams as valuable, then she would feel that she wasn’t alone, that her Mum was indeed with her.

The dream taught me about childhood conditioning: It wasn’t my house, it wasn’t my family and it wasn’t my problem to sort out, although I dreamt about tidying up the stinky rubbish in the house. My friend wasn’t tidying up the rubbish, her Mum wasn’t tidying up the rubbish, I was the one tidying up the rubbish and taking it out of the house.

I realized that my parents taught me to take responsibility for them and for the problems within their dysfunctional relationship. This is not a good thing and I have worked a lot on this problem, however, the dream showed me there was more work to be done. I was so grateful to have the dream to demonstrate to me that my old pattern of taking responsibility for others, was very much alive and it gave me something to work on. End dream interpretation.

I thought it was fascinating that a single dream could provide me with such enormous insight. That’s what I want for you, reading this now. I want you to benefit from your dreams as I do. Record them, include what happened the day before, get your dreams interpreted or do your best to link up real life with your dream to decipher its invaluable messages.

To me, dreams are like gold. I pick up the gold and spend it on making my life easier. Other people walk passed the gold and their life is harder because the answers they seek for peace and happiness were in their dreams but they didn’t stop to pay attention. Let yourself be your own guide through paying attention to your dreams.

There is almost nowhere else on earth where you will receive free help for your life. You don’t have to go anywhere to have your dreams and you don’t have to pay anybody in order to have them. Isn’t that great! Your intuition is your best help and available to you every night in your dreams.

DREAMS – Who Was Making Love To You, In Your Dream?

Series: Change Your Life Through Dreaming – Part 6

Being Happier Podcast“Who Is Making Love To You, In Your Dream?”

You would have heard somebody having one of ‘those’ dreams, perhaps you’ve had them yourself, where somebody is making love to you. The alarm clock goes off… but you reeeally want to stay in your dream 😉

The dream might not be intimate to that extent, but you could be in somebody’s arms, lying under a tree, perhaps you’re on a lovely walk in the forest or at the beach. Effectively, romantic or other hot stuff is going on. So who is that person?

It’s less likely to be a person. Actually it would be more correct to say it’s not a ‘person’ at all, and much more likely to be a spirit guide.

It can sound a bit weird and embarrassing. It’s like somebody else apart from you (your spirit guide), knows that the lovemaking dream occurred. Otherwise no ‘body’ would know and that can feel better.

Most people don’t like to admit that they’re feeling that level of vulnerability or yearning, but the spirit guide always knows the state of your heart.

What is a spirit guide? In brief, a spirit guide is a spirit, they are not in a body, and they’re there =for you=, for company, advice and guidance. They love you and they are there to look after you and all of your emotional and spiritual needs.

You can have other types of guidance coming from spirits, who are relatives or friends no longer alive, but they have not been assigned to keep your soul, as specifically as a spirit guide.

Here are some of the circumstances in which you’re likely to trigger one of these love-making dreams:

  • You’ve been separated from your romantic partner, deliberately or accidentally.
  • You’re single, feeling lonely and longing for a relationship.
  • You’re single or in a relationship but you haven’t had proper closeness or good sex for a while (perhaps a long while).
  • You’re in an unhappy relationship and wondering about being with somebody else.
  • You’re single and don’t want to be in a relationship cause you’ve ‘been there, done that’ but a part of you yearns for it.

Dreaming about making love

Some people, especially if they want to know who their next relationship is, will have such a dream and will pay particular attention to what the stranger looked like so they can identify them in real life.

It is possible to dream of the person you’re about to meet next, and if it’s happened to you, well done! It’s also possible to have a ‘dream relationship’ with somebody from real life because you can’t be together. Otherwise, rarely are these dreams predictive or actual in nature.

You can dream of somebody in a romantic context, that you haven’t been in touch with for a while: they could be your ex, somebody you liked at work, met at a party or even a stranger you crossed paths with. In all these cases, there is a feeling you’re looking for, which is why that person from real life, is in your dream.

You might also have some unfinished business with somebody in real life, in which case you might dream about that person often, in a romantic sense.

In most cases, the ‘person’ in your romantic dream, is a spirit guide. They can sometimes take the guise of somebody you know, so you think you’re dreaming of the gorgeous person across the street, when really you’re dreaming of your spirit guide.

Generally, your spirit guide in your romantic dream, doesn’t look like anybody you know. Occasionally they’re a celebrity.

The giveaway that you’re dreaming of your spirit guide:

  • The ‘person’ in your dream is attractive.
  • They have things about them which appeal to you.
  • They don’t look like anybody you actually know personally.

They have things about them that appeal to you, because your spirit guide knows what you like…and how you like it 😉

Lovemaking dreams and romantic dreams, happen to give you an emotional lift. They happen in order to heal you because you’re needing love and attention in some way, but you’re not getting it.

You might not be meeting the man or woman of your ‘dreams’ tomorrow, but you can be really happy and secure that you’re NEVER alone because you’re spirit guide is ALWAYS there.

If you’re spirit guide is coming into your dreams in this fashion, it’s such a lovely reminder that you do indeed have a close connection with him or her; that they have heard your call and have arrived in your dreams to look after your happiness…


    • Benita offers Dream Interpretation with all intuitive counselling and healing visits, over the Phone, Skype or In-person at her healing practice in Eltham, Melbourne.

DREAMS – Dreams Show The Importance Of Feeling Your Feelings

Series: Change Your Life Through Dreaming – Part 5

Being Happier Podcast“Dreams Show The Importance Of Feeling Your Feelings.”

When you dream of somebody suffering in some way, physically or emotionally, even if they don’t look like you, IT IS YOU.

The suffering that is being shown to you in the dream, may have happened recently in the dream, but the pain could very well be from the past and only showing itself now.

You could have had some traumatic incident or a period of time, 6 or 12 or 24 months ago, but you didn’t fully feel the pain and the stress that was happening to you then, you suppressed it. Pain from such times, can take a while to come up to the surface, because along with suppressing it, you may have only just realised how bad it actually was, back then.

You could have had a series of lightbulb moments just yesterday or a few days ago, where you realise how much a person or situation negatively affected you in the past, that it was much worse than you could conceptualize or process at the time. It could have taken you this long to acknowledge and feel your feelings from months, years or decades ago.

When you’re in emotional pain, there’s a disassociation that occurs. The norm is to separate it from yourself because it might be inconvenient to feel at that moment; you might not have the support you need to allow the pain to come up; you might have had other pressing demands that cause you to feel you didn’t have time for all this feeling stuff.

Because a disassociation occurs with your feelings, because you separate yourself from your painful feelings, the person who is suffering in your dream, doesn’t look like you. You’ve done that. You’ve separated your feelings, so you’ve also separated the physical features you have to look like somebody else from a different culture, nationality, age, even sex.

It more often happens that ‘another person’, not you, is suffering in the dream. It can be you suffering in your dream, this is a better sign, which means that you’re feeling your feelings more and owning them, rather than disassociating and disowning them.

A dream about suffering, while it might not look or feel good, it is actually a healing dream to show you what is happening within you: you’re realizing that you were traumatized; you’re feeling your feelings; the pain (possibly from the past) is finally coming up to the surface; your feelings are being validated, by yourself and or another.

Honour your dreams, there’re so many answers within them. There is hardly anybody on the planet who can tell you about the emotional progress you’re making within yourself, but your dreams can do this every night.

Your Higher Self is trying to communicate to you through your dreams, your heart is trying to communicate to you about what’s going on ‘in there’, through your dreams. Pay attention to your dreams, you’ll never be without answers.

DREAMS – Dreams That Warn Of Coming Visitors

The “Being Happier” Podcast

Today’s Topic: Change Your Life Through Dreaming – Part 4

Being Happier PodcastChange Your Life Through Dreaming – Part 4

“Dreams That Warn Of Coming Visitors.”

If you’re not in the habit of paying attention to your dreams and I told you that dreams can help you prepare for unexpected visitors or contact, you might take them more seriously. Rather, you might take your own intuition more seriously because your dreams are like your intuition.

You could have a predictive dream that could be warning you that somebody will be in touch with you. Not warning you like the person who might be in touch is evil, but warning in terms of helping you be prepared to deal with the upcoming contact.

The person who you may be about to run into or ring you, might be perceived by you as being a bit ‘evil’, they might be an ex, or an old boss you hated or somebody else you had a fight with, in which case the dream may very well act like an actual warning to help protect you from sudden surprises.

It may not feel like a warning in the dream, because you won’t be ‘thinking’ in the dream, you’ll be getting on with the dreaming.

The dream might show a letter arriving or a text or email or a phone ringing or somebody knocking on the door, but in the dream, it may not be clear -who- is in contact. In the dream, you might only notice the nature of the contact without knowing who it is. Or, you might get a blatant and straightforward cue from your dream, maybe somebody saying that the person you’re concerned about, is going to be in touch. Sometimes these prediction dreams can be obscure, other times they can be direct messages.

Most people would want to be prepared for contact from a person they had a conflict with or a person who has been off the radar for some years. It’s always easier to orient yourself before the interaction actually occurs, rather than to be caught off guard with the person in question suddenly staring you in the face. So if you do have a dream about some form of communication, pay attention.

Thank yourself as well, for your intuition being strong enough to warn you of future events. You must have a stronger intuitive link with your higher self in this case and or with the surprise person you’re about to communicate with. And help yourself have more of these kinds of signs and warnings for other future events, by getting into the habit of recording your dreams every time you recall them.

Just write down a few words to summarize the dream, to help prompt you later to reflect on the dream and important messages therein. So rather than ‘accidentally’ having a predictive dream that was lucky and well-timed helping you prepare for surprises, increase your chances of these dreams happening more regularly, with the regular habit of writing your dreams down.

The deliberate exercise of writing your dreams down regularly will strengthen your intuition which means your predictive dreams have a chance to happen often.

Just to conclude the message about paying attention to predictive dreams about future contact from somebody, note anything in the dream to do with a text, email, a phone ringing or a letter. It may be the same person in the dream trying to contact you as they are in real life, it could be a different person and it may not be the same communication method in the dream as it ends up being in real life. Somebody is trying to reach you and you can help yourself be prepared by recalling and acting on your dreams.

Dreams – Is Somebody Invading Your Dream Space?

The “Being Happier” Podcast

Today’s Topic: Change Your Life Through Dreaming – Part 3

Is Somebody Invading Your Dream Space?

This message on Change Your Life Through Dreaming, part 3, is about how people can communicate to you through your dreams, sometimes, specifically, because they want to control you.

In arguments and other situations where conflict arises, there tends to be one person who is more reasonable while the other person is less reasonable. The more reasonable person, you for instance, might feel that the less reasonable person is still hung up on their point in the conflict. They dig in their heels, they want to ‘make’ you take something on board and you can feel their force about this. It causes you to want space away from them, through time or distance, because you are feeling the pressure they are putting on you to make you think like them.

You don’t want to contact them, but you have an uncomfortable feeling that ‘they’ want ‘you’ to contact them. If you contact them, then in their mind, you have come round, which has somehow proved them right and you wrong.

The less reasonable person in real life, might find their way into your dreams, to ensure that they drill their point home, while you’re feeling invaded in the dream.

Take note here, these dreams are more real than you think. The other person is trying to force contact and force you to agree with something and without realizing it, they have disturbed you on a very deep level, in your dreams. Their energy has penetrated yours and you feel you can’t get a break from them, not even while you’re trying to sleep.

The person you had or are having a conflict with: friend, partner, ex, relative, colleague, might come into your dreams into spaces that are (in real life), specially reserved for one other person, maybe only you: bathroom, toilet, bedroom, house, office or study, as examples. In the dream, you are outraged, stressed, anxious or fearful that they are there. You feel invaded, cornered, like you have no peaceful space left to yourself to feel free and relaxed.

“Could this really be happening… Is somebody invading my dreams… Isn’t it ‘just’ a dream?” No. The other person is being rude and disrespectful of your boundaries. But how did this happen?

The person who is invading your dreams, don’t have special powers, they didn’t get into your dream because they are a witch or a devil. So how did they get into your dream?

The person you’re having a conflict with, the person you want distance from, can feel, energetically, that you are guilty for creating that gap between you. If you weren’t feeling doubtful of your decision to have space from them, if you weren’t feeling like a bad person because of it, they couldn’t come into your dreams.

So dreams, these dreams, can change your life, if you pay attention to them. These types of dreams where you feel cornered or invaded by another, happens because you need to learn to be responsible for you. If you felt stronger in yourself, if you felt that it is correct that you are allowed to have time and space away from somebody who is causing you stress, then your dreams will be more peaceful and you won’t have (as many) intruders.

You will also be able to live your waking life with more conviction because you are more aware of supporting your own feelings, rather than allowing yourself to feel disturbed by supporting other people’s feelings.

Dreams – Your Dreams Can Be Your Diet Counselor

Change Your Life Through Dreaming – Part 2
Your Dreams Can Be Your Diet Counselor.

If you have your diet in mind because of weight you might be trying to lose, or if you realised that you’re getting a bit flabby and you need toning, you might seek some advice from friends or professionals. It’s generally not a consideration for you to consult your dreams on the matter. But don’t underestimate yourself or your dreams.

Dreams can be particularly helpful concerning diet advice, for foods that you might need to cut out, for example a person who is allergic to wheat, might have dreams where wheat features.

As an example with my client, she wanted to become a vegan. She had already stopped eating land animals and sea animals and had become a vegetarian, but dairy and eggs were her next goal to cut out so she wasn’t eating any animal products at all. My client was kind of looking for a sign for when she should do this and if she was making the right decision. She came to her session wanting to discuss this.

I said to her that if her intuition was going to give her a sign about timing, it would occur in a very straight forward, yet possibly not obvious way. I use the analogy of a 3D puzzle. If you look at a 3D puzzle, you might not see the point of it straight away. But if you look at the puzzle for long enough, an image will jump out and seem so obvious you wonder why you never saw it before.

Just like a 3D puzzle, you’re not going to get the point of a dream straight away, but if you think deeper about the images presented, you’re more likely to realize the advice from your dreams than if you dismissed your dreams.

My client’s dream was about cooked eggs next to a beautiful and magical nature scene. That’s all. She said the nature scene seemed to be spoilt by the eggs being there. I let her know that right there, was her advice and direction from the dream. She felt from the dream that the eggs didn’t belong and should be removed. If you apply her feelings to her wondering about her diet, the eggs need to be removed from her diet.

She had a lightbulb moment and another shortly to follow, when I talked about meat and animal products blocking intuition. It’s not a rule that applies to everybody, because some people can have very unhealthy diets and eat a lot of meat and they can still be very intuitive. But in general, not eating meat nor animal products, will help your intuition and healing ability get stronger.

My client had another lightbulb moment because she wanted to do a natural healing course and wondered if she should be become a vegan before she started studying the course. I felt her dream was telling her she was ready to stop eating eggs and it was a good time to change her diet before her study.

I’m not especially talking about becoming a vegan here, more so: you can get more diet advice than you ever thought possible, from your dreams. This can be especially useful to you if you are fructose or lactose intolerant.

My suggestion is for you to keep a dream journal of any dreams you may have. Interpreting your dreams will help you with heaps of different things, not just your diet. And as you keep your journal, over a three month period, note the dreams you have about food. What could your dreams be saying about cutting out or reducing particular foods from your diet?

Dreams – Change Your Life Through Dreaming

Change Your Life Through Dreaming – Part 1

The dreams you have at night and their meanings for your life are not reserved for people who have an interest in them or for those who already understand a little about them. The answers dreams hold for your life are numerous and endless and enormously helpful to assist you in figuring out all sorts of problems.

Your dreams can tell you how to fix the mysterious problem in your car, your dreams can show you why you’re having a relationship conflict, your dreams can show you how to physically heal from an illness. If you knew and believed that, you would want to record them every night and have them interpreted regularly. It’s like learning another language, you’re not going to instantly understand a foreign language, but if you’re around that culture or in that country you pick up words here and there… how…? Because you’re open.

If you’re open to your dreams helping you, you’re going to be able to move faster in life and achieve the things you want. But you can’t achieve what you want in general be it improved health, improved income or improved relationships, there can’t be improvements while there are energy leaks within you.

Your dreams can show you where and how your energy is leaking. Sealing energy leaks will make you move forward in life because you’re not caught up in the past which is where your energy might be leaking away. When you have all your energy, here and now, ready to use, you will be able to live your dreams (aspirations) and enjoy life so much better and easier. So try not to box up understanding your dreams as something belonging to the esoteric, or try not to limit wanting to know about them when you can be bothered.

Dreams hold the keys for where your energy is leaking, and when that stops you can speed ahead in your V8 instead of in your 4 cylinder car. You’ll just be so much happier and successful!