From “The Healing Show” Series #08: How to Heal Sleep
EPISODE #08: Express Feelings To Heal Sleep
I thoroughly know what it’s like to lose sleep for days and months and years on end. It makes me tired just writing that! But seriously, if you’re not having a good sleep every night, life during the day feels much harder.
Most people who have sleep problems wake between 1am and 6am. This excludes the alarm set for work and things like that. I’m talking about ‘unnatural’ wake times, like waking at 2am or 4.30am.
When you are waking at night, do pay attention to the times that you’re waking up in. Are you always waking at 2am? Are you always waking at 4.30am?
I say this because your body is on a clock. I’m not talking about the body clock that seems to get set because of the daily alarm and even on holidays you’re automatically waking at 6.30am. I’m referring to the organs in your body having their peak time of functioning and they occur in two-hour time blocks, eg. Liver time is between 1- 3am.
The reason I’m talking about ‘organ’ time is because each organ is associated with certain emotions, eg. The emotions related to the liver are to do with anger and resentment. This can be a key for you to figure out why you’re waking at certain times and not at other times. Effectively, by recalling the time you’re awake and linking it up with the emotions of that time slot, you can help yourself heal your sleep problems.
1-3 am Anger and resentment.
3- 5am Grief, guilt and regret, in an acute sense.
5- 7am Grief, guilt and regret, in a less acute sense.
Let’s talk about feelings for a minute…
From a metaphysical point of view, when you suppress your feelings, bad things happen, like you get sick or… have sleep problems. Any suppressed emotion, when suppressed hard enough and long enough will cause health problems. Sleep problems are included in this.
Why are you suppressing your feelings?
Because most of us came from dysfunctional families, where our parents/ guardians didn’t ask us how we were feeling. Most of us didn’t experience our parents asking us how we were, how we felt about school, friends, them as parents, other family members, whether we were happy, fulfilled or if we wanted to change anything. Most of us never got our feelings supported, discussed, addressed or healed.
What happened to most of us as children was that our feelings got ignored. So we grow up ignoring our own feelings and suppressing them.
If you pay attention to the times when you’re awake, you can learn about what feelings you’re suppressing, therefore, you can help yourself express those particular feelings with friends and therapists, instead of ignoring them which can lead to sleep problems.
If you’re always waking at 2am, then you must be really angry about something. You will need to explore: who makes you angry?
What made you angry?
It’s normally a ‘who’, not a what.
Who is making you feel resentful?
What have they done?
If you’re waking at 3.30am, then you’re feeling grief, guilt or regret in an acute sense. What are you feeling sad about?
Who is making you sad?
What are you feeling guilty about?
Who is making you feel guilty?
What are you regretting?
Who are you regretting?
If you’re waking across all emotion time slots, then you will need to explore all the feelings: anger, resentment, acute and less acute grief, guilt and regret.
The anger or grief with somebody may have happened weeks, months, years, even many years ago… You may have been really sad about something that happened 15 years ago, but you’ve never healed from it and the fact that you’re still waking in grief time since all those years ago, proves that.
You may have been angry about somebody since a few months ago and since then, you’re always waking in anger time.
In order for you to heal your sleep, an important step is to explore your feelings and express them with somebody who will listen to them properly and understand them and support them.
As your feelings get aired, discussed and supported, there are less feelings to suppress. If there are less feelings to suppress, then your sleep won’t get disturbed or your sleep won’t get disturbed for as long as it normally does.
Express your feelings and heal your sleep problems.